Thursday, January 08, 2009

Baloney Hi Coos and Faux Cues Number 166

-Finding Weed In Storage

Category: Dreams and the Supernatural

This is a strange one

You may want to stick around

Just to see how it ends…

I guess you could go right to the end…

So I found a large amount of weed

Strong modern marijuana

AS well as older “Old School” weed

In a storage room facility

I haven’t smoked in 24 years…

Haven’t wanted to

Weed can be a cuddly teddy bear

That can become rabid and eat your shit

So, this modern paranoid weed

Which makes you lock down

And wait for the end of the world

Looked really good to me

And I find all kinds of drugs

Which I just turn over to my workers

I usually have no interest

I’m naturally high

Which means

Rabid paranoid shit

Comes second nature…

Two weeks have gone by

I haven’t smoked any

I think about this shit everyday

It pisses me off

That this is my focus

So I had to do something…

So, I worked on my spice rack

I have about 100 spices

All in mad scientist clear glass beakers

I love looking at the colors of spices

The dark browns, the yellow of mustard

The rusty red peppers…

All in Scientific lab equipment;

Serum Vials, beakers, petri dishes…

It’s great when someone comes to the home

And I am cooking out of biohazard bags

Turn your kitchen into a lab

You will want to cook all the time

So tonight a made an extra lab rack

For the newly acquired weed

Each weed has a guess name in a new beaker “Ancient Pyramids” for weed that looks familiar

There’s “Nutty Mad”  for the modern stuff

Maybe I’ll just start collecting weed

I don’t think I’ll ever smoke it

Every now and then I’ll smell it

Like the way I smell fennugreek

Or the Juniper berries I keep in vials

My wife asked me what I was doing

I had to tell her

She knows when I’m lying

I asked her if she wanted to smoke some weed

“That weed could be laced with pcp” she said

I said,”Are you on crack”

“You got it out of a storage room…

Are you fucking nuts

If you want to smoke weed

Go buy some you cheap chubby junkman…”

Maybe one day I’ll cook some up

But not as long as I want to smoke it

I’ll smoke some

When I don’t want to anymore

And certainly not till…

Obviously, not till there’s world peace

Monday, January 05, 2009

Baloney Hi Coos and Faux Cues Number 165

-dishwasher

Category: Art and Photography

I come home to a sink full of dishes

Interlocked and unstable

(Both the pile and my head)

Begin the Jenga Operation

I’ve done my best work

Because I do the dishes

Since I’ve been a kid

Listened to great music

Thought great thoughts

Something about the struggle

I pile the dishes as high as I can

Sometimes, I pretend they’re floating

Like a Mobile above a baby’s crib

I look forward to sharing

This tea ceremony of dirty water

With my kids

I wonder when they will realize

Why we don’t get a machine